Fleeing Felon Foiled by Fighting Ferret

I really have no clue how John Mesirow finds these pieces for his blog Legal Juice. But he does, and some are just worth repeating and giving him credit for because you just can't match the master. Here goes this newest item:

It's strange enough that the dude stole a ferret, but even stranger how he got it out of the pet store. By putting it down his pants! Per The Florida Times-Union:

A Jacksonville Beach police arrest report said a 17-year-old saw a man take a ferret from the pet store, stuff it down the front of his pants and walk out of the store. The teen alerted store clerks to the theft, then followed the man to a nearby parking lot on First Avenue North.

Lifting a line from a recent Juice favorite, Zombieland, it was time for the teen to "nut up or shut up." And nut up he did.

The teen tried to retrieve the ferret from the shoplifter, but the man punched him and they both fell to the ground. As they tussled on the ground, the man shoved the ferret in the teen's face and squeezed it.

The ferret, a small domesticated type of weasel, lunged at the teen and bit him, leaving two puncture holes in his ear, the arrest report says. The ferret was not injured.

Well done young man. And what happened to the thief?

... Rodney Bolton, was arrested ... and charged with stealing the $129 ferret from the Pet Supermarket at 609 Beach Blvd. in Jacksonville Beach. He was also charged with battery with a "special weapon," police said.

Too bad the "special weapon" didn't deploy as it was being stolen from the store ...

Drive Safely this Weekend; BSO Blitz in Progress

I do not know how John Mesirow keeps on finding these great posts on his blog Legal Juice.

But I agree with this one, if there is a worse driver out there, I'd be shocked. As reported in The Hamilton Spectator, here are some highlights of Toronto resident Gloria O'Neill's driving history:
Her driver’s licence was suspended as far back as 1978, when she was just 21. In 1984, it was suspended again.

Still forbidden to drive, she got a new licence under a different name. When that, too, was suspended, she got a third. In 1995, according to parole documents, O’Neill rolled her car on Highway 401, breaking her back in two places. She was charged in March of that year with driving while under suspension and got 15 days in jail.

Five years ago, after she [ran a red light, and] dragged a pedestrian to his death in a crosswalk, a court banned her from driving for 10 years. At the time of this hit-and-run, she was driving with TWO suspended licenses, under different names. She was also convicted of perjury for lying at her bail hearing about her criminal record and multiple licence suspensions. She only served 9 months for killing this man!

All told, [Ms. O'Neill] has been involved in at least 15 collisions, often in rented or borrowed cars.
This would be a funny photo had the driver not a history of killing and maiming people on the roadways. So BSO is doing its aggressive zero tolerance driving blitz again this weekend.

Drive carefully. The life you save may be your own.

Speeding Judge Uses Dead Witness for Corroboration

John Mesirow has a great blog. Short, tight, and concise pieces straight to the point. Not too heavy. Easy reading, wonderful photos. Got to get more like him. Last month, I did this long piece about how judges across the country were getting in trouble everywhere.

Got picked up by http://www.counterpunch.org/kent02242009.html and have no doubt I would have included this tidbit below from the Legal Juicer himself had I seen it before I published:

'Nobody likes getting a speeding ticket. But how far would you go to beat it? If you are Australian Judge Marcus Enfield (former Judge, that is), you'd go pretty damn far. As reported at abc.net.au, Mr. Enfield got a speeding ticket in 2006. What was his defense?

[H]e claimed his car was being driven by a friend, Teresa Brennan. Mind you, this was a judge testifying, under oath.

The problem:
It later emerged that [Ms. Brennan] had died in 2003. Mr. Brennan pleaded guilty to "making a false statement under oath and trying to pervert the course of justice." He is awaiting sentencing.

Just a reminder to some who practice in traffic court that it is not a game. It is a real court room and you can get in just as much trouble being careless and slovenly in what you do there as in 'real courts.' You are an attorney twenty four hours a day.

Breast Feeding Driver Arrested in Dayton

One news item in one small town picked up by one blogger can spread through the Internet like flames in the Everglades on a dry day.

I think this piece could have originated with John Mesirow's blog The Juice, or it may have been on the Althouse. Whereever it may have started, it is fanning the flames of unfettered commentary as only a woman's breasts are wont to do.

We know many communities are passing laws against texting or talking while driving. Once even had a case where a cop ticketed some guy for knotting his tie while driving, complaining the motorist did not have either of his hands on the wheel. Ah, the joys of being a traffic judge. But in the small town of Kettering, Ohio, a woman has been charged with child endangerment by breast-feeding a youngster and talking on a phone while driving. No medals here for multitasking, as Mesirow noted.

Police followed up on an anonymous complaint, and using a license plate number tracked down 39-year-old Genine Compton. According to police, the woman admitted to an officer that she did do the deed because she "wouldn't let her child go hungry." Was she and the 2 year old read their Miranda rights before the confession?

Officers cited her, and said the legal concern is that Compton had a child in her lap while driving, not that she was breast-feeding in public. Police say the woman faces up to 180 days in jail and a $1,800 fine if convicted of the misdemeanor. All righty, then. Another blow for justice. Glad to know our priorities are together.

Here is your news story from the glamorous Dayton Daily News:

http://www.daytondailynews.com/n/content/oh/story/news/local/2009/02/27/ddn022709breastfeedweb.html